Britain’s high-readiness aircraft carrier HMS Queen Elizabeth will sail today for the Arctic Circle to support a secret multinational mission, the UK Defence Journal has learned.
The vessel is being deployed to act as an emergency landing option should “a classified cargo aircraft” require its usage. We earlier reported that Typhoon jets will be deploying to the Arctic for what is intended to be a secret escort mission involving a cargo aircraft. We believe these deployments are related.
Speaking to NATO Admiral Feliz Navidad, we were told that this special cargo mission is being supported by both NATO and Russian assets.
Other commentators have noted that the loading of provisions would be unusual as the craft is rumoured to be elf-sufficient and shouldn’t need anything else.
The Royal Navy told us:
“Part of HMS Queen Elizabeth’s previous trials involved the fitting of STOVL (Sleigh Take Off and Vixen Landing) equipment allowing for this kind of aircraft to land and take-off from the carrier.”
We understand that the undisclosed cargo is to be revealed nationwide on the morning of the 25th of this month but only to good boys and girls.
According to Foreign Office spokesman Nicholas Cringle:
“We’ve received a request for assistance to support a multi-national air transport mission being launched from a currently undisclosed location within the Arctic Circle. As such, HMS Queen Elizabeth is being redirected to provide emergency provisions and a ‘back up’ option should the cargo aircraft involved need to land and refuel.”
An MoD spokesman had this to say:
“Interception is part of what the QRA force do. We have to identify and confirm who or what is flying through our airspace or approaching our airspace and since the craft appears at the same time each year, we have a fairly good idea who will be flying but we don’t take any chances.”
The Ministry of Defence used satellites with infra-red sensors to track the aircraft last time this happened, it is understood that the heat from an animals red nose was clearly visible and it was at this point RAF aircraft began escorting the bright red aircraft over every British city, town and village.
UPDATE: We understand the provisions HMS Queen Elizabeth has been loaded with include Brandy and small biscuits. Also, this is just a Christmas joke designed to brighten your day in case you haven’t yet realised.
Presents only to good boys and girls. That’s me f*ck then
Me too. Humbug!
Hey coal in the stocking may prove valuable this year, provided environmental permits/waivers are approved! Best wishes to all for 2023!
A rumor has surfaced that there has been a black world program to redesign the sleigh w/ latest stealth technology and EW package for eventualities such as crossing UKR and Russian airspace. LM execs state they can neither confirm nor deny any such program or activity. 🤔😳😉
Ah yes, LM’s secretive Grinch Works.
BTW, ‘Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!’
All for the bargain price of $100 billion. They were going to use Boeing to upgrade the sleigh but they quoted 10 years timescale and to use the same tech as the 737max
In the giving spirit of the season, believe LM BAFO was $99.99B. 😁
Only takes one good (and cooperative) woman to turn that frown into the wisest grin! 😁 Good hunting!
Er…widest…though wisest may have been a Freudian slip…
This cargo aircraft doesn’t seem very big if it can STOVL. Is it going to be able to carry all the necessary kit to satisfy my waiting trio? I thought there was a claus in the contract that guaranteed delivery on the right day. What with the Elf service on strike and the Grinch causing all sorts of problems we are in a right state. Deerie me! I’m off for a donner.🍢 See you. 🎅
Red sleigh down
.
That is awful! 😆
Ski-Jump certification for Rangifer Tarandus assisted aviation platforms.
This is getting old now. Ho ho ho.
Would not be the same UKDJ without it.
I think George is just a big kid! Either that or he has convinced his own children that his website is able to track Santa and divert him if they haven’t been good. This may have worked in the past but you have to keep it up. Luckily mine have children of their own, my responsibilities are over.
Nothing wrong with being a big kid.
I think it’s great, the traditional yearly Christmas posts!
Absolutely Daniele. Next minute David will be claiming Santa ain’t real!! Tomorrow morning we are having a Christmas themed Park Run with mince pies and some small dops(local word for an alcoholic tipple)
Love to you and your family from Jan and I
Morning geoff.
That sounds great, we are still Covid positive after a week, my Dad is alone in his flat with a cold, my mums in hospital with flu and Actial Fibrillation, and I’m spending half my time at her house looking after her Cat!
Xmas is of course, totally off from a social point of view, and we had several meet ups planned. Oh well!
Will still enjoy best we can.
Thank you my friend, love and best wishes, Debbie and Daniele.
Daniele-your plate is full!! 🙁 Hope everything comes right for you soon!
David wrote: “”This is getting old now.”” Of course it is, its one of the traits of getting older.. cynicism. But in doing so, we forget the joys of being a child when everything was magic, then we experience the joys of teenage scepticism whilst still looking forward to having Jim fix it to fill your stocking. That moves us into young adulthood where going out on the lash all over Christmas is the thing to do, then you become a parent where you go out of your way to make sure that your child enjoys the magic of Christmas,… Read more »
Bah humbug, Farouk.
Rumour has it that Jim I’ll fix it liked to do a bit more than fill ur stocking.
I fear I am socially distanced from Santa. Something about a restraining order. I was nowhere near that reindeer.
I’m socially distanced from my Siblings since, Apparently, Looking After My Parents:
A QRA my Siblings Most Determinedly Declined and ensured the STOL of My Existence in (D)evolution Scotland:
Santa lost the Gyro-compassion for the Coordinations for My Location years ago
If I’m not mistaken, It would seem I Have Been Volunteered Into IT, Like Parents Themselves Volunteered for Hostilities Services in Second World War through Tradition of University and Fathers’ Own Armed Services of The Great War 1914-1918 and Thereafter in Army of Occupation in the Demoralised Germany of Retribution that would prove to Backfire with a vengeance
Any rumors abroad in the realm re current status of HMS PoW? Is no news, good news, or simply that?
Haven’t heard anything. If I get a chance I’m going to have a look at her from the forth bridge.
👍
Good Morning George from a sunny Durban RSA- a brief respite from weeks of rain. Nice to hear that the Royal Navy rides to the rescue once again! All the best to you and all our friends on UKDJ for Christmas and the New Year
Unbelievable treason! Yet again the press demonstrate that they live and / or have loyalty to another country! To publish national secrets used to be a hanging offence and maybe it’s time to re-introduce the penalty for editors and owners!
Poor attempt at a joke.
Reminds me of the many guard reports filled out saying a man and a woman were stopped at the gate asking for rooms as there were none at the Inn,
or sightings of a fat man in a red suit being challenged by the roaming patrol.
Another trope. Christmas morning – the phone rings at Jesus College Oxford/Cambridge (both exist). Caller: Is that Jesus ? Porter: Yes: Caller: (singing) Happy Birthday to you.