British carrier to sail to Arctic for secret mission

Britain’s flagship aircraft carrier, HMS Prince of Wales, will sail today for the Arctic Circle to support a secret multinational mission at the North Pole, the UK Defence Journal has learned.

The vessel is being deployed to act as an emergency landing option should “a classified cargo aircraft” require its usage.

We earlier reported that Typhoon jets will be deploying to the Arctic for what is intended to be a secret escort mission involving a cargo aircraft. We believe these deployments are related.

Speaking to NATO Admiral Feliz Navidad, we were told that this special cargo mission is being supported by NATO members and even Russian assets. Other commentators have noted that the loading of provisions would be unusual as the craft is rumoured to be elf-sufficient and shouldn’t need anything else.

RAF on alert due to potential Arctic cargo aircraft activity

The Royal Navy told us:

“Part of HMS Prince of Wale’s previous trials involved the fitting of STOVL (Sleigh Take Off and Vixen Landing) equipment allowing for this kind of aircraft to land and take-off from the carrier.”

We understand that the undisclosed cargo is to be revealed nationwide on the morning of the 25th of this month, but only to good boys and girls.

According to Foreign Office spokesman Nicholas Cringle:

“We’ve received a request for assistance to support a multi-national air transport mission being launched from a currently undisclosed location within the Arctic Circle. As such, the carrier is being redirected to provide emergency provisions and a ‘back up’ option should the cargo aircraft involved need to land and refuel.”

This comes not long after it was announced that the Royal Air Force is on high alert this month in order to track cargo flights from the Arctic region.

Typhoon jets to head to Arctic for secret escort mission

An MoD spokesman, Noel Joy, had this to say:

“Interception is part of what the QRA force do. We have to identify and confirm who or what is flying through our airspace or approaching our airspace and since the craft appears at the same time each year, we have a fairly good idea who will be flying but we don’t take any chances.”

The Ministry of Defence used satellites with infra-red sensors to track the aircraft last time this happened, it is understood that the heat from an animals red nose was clearly visible and it was at this point RAF aircraft began escorting the bright red aircraft over every British city, town and village.

UPDATE: We understand the provisions loaded with include Brandy and small biscuits.

This is just a Christmas joke designed to brighten your day in case you haven’t yet realised. As a bit of fun, look for the comments saying ‘not so secret now!’ or ‘so secret it’s on social media!’ as they’re getting coal this year for not actually reading an article before sharing or commenting on it. For an extra bit of Christmas fun, have a look for the people responding to this article with comments like “Not secret now!“, they haven’t read the article.