It has emerged this morning that work promised to Scotland will instead go to Ruritania after Zenda Industries won a contract to build frigates.

The UK is currently building Type 26 Frigates on the Clyde, Type 31 Frigates in Rosyth as well as planning to build Type 32 Frigates and Type 83 Destroyers. All of these will now be built in Ruritania.

Anthony Hope, spokesman for Zenda, said:

“People will likely share this article and not read it, which is why we’re naming the ships we build the ‘Misinformation’ class.”

MoD Spokesman, Lee Iyar, said:

“This is a welcome development, it will reduce the carbon footprint of our defence procurement work in the UK and will help reduce emissions targets.”

Chinook helicopters will fly the currently in-build HMS Glasgow from the Clyde to the capital of Ruritania.

We spoke to an angry Twitter person who told us:

“Despite the fact ships are in fact being built in Scotland, this is proof that ships are not being built in Scotland. I’m very happy about this because it proves what I’ve been trying to tell people all along, there are zero ships in Scotland.”


Congratulations, and thank you for reading the whole article; this is just an April Fools Day joke. The article above is not true, and if anyone is sharing it after April 1st, please remind them of that fact.

The purpose of this article, aside from our usual April Fool’s Day joke, is to make the point that reading beyond the headline should be the norm every day, not just on the 1st of April. There’s a large volume of misinformation online. Make sure you don’t add to it by sharing articles without reading them. Finally, be careful of the person sharing this article after the 1st of April as they very clearly don’t read what they share.

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maurice10
maurice10
5 days ago

No! It’s the Isle Of Man so I’ve been told by a bloke in a pubbbbbbbbbb.

Tommo
Tommo
5 days ago

Those dockies,will have too get up pretty early if they want to clock in over in Ruritania and then back for evening stovies it will be along bus ride hope the SFM will subserdise their bus fares it’s the least he can do

Andrew Munro
Andrew Munro
5 days ago

Is this due ti Clyde silting up?

Martyn B
Martyn B
4 days ago

At least they would be built on time and on budget.

Robert Cook
Robert Cook
4 days ago

I think it rather demeaning for an authoritative organisation like this to indulge in such frippery. Best left to the lightweight tabloids.

Kirstin Darke
Kirstin Darke
4 days ago

Google is going to be showing this on its start page for a week or so after April 1st, I should think. That’s where I found it, anyway.

George Allison
3 minutes ago
Reply to  Kirstin Darke

I’d hope not, it’s marked as not to be crawled.

Danny Gault
Danny Gault
4 days ago

I cannot belive we are moving mod work abroad be ut on your heads that’s embarrassing and frightening.

George Allison
3 days ago
Reply to  Danny Gault

It’s an April Fools Day article, as it says in black and white, for Christs sake…

Aidan Reilly
Aidan Reilly
3 days ago
Reply to  George Allison

Not funny, George. Other ones have been OK, such as the return of the Harrier but how hilarious it is to lose your income oh no April Fool ffs how about your mum died o no only joking. Tasteless! Please tell Avril off..

George Allison
1 day ago
Reply to  Aidan Reilly

Not funny to, who, you? Loads of people thought it was funny.

SailorBoy
SailorBoy
3 days ago
Reply to  George Allison

Got one at least then, good work UKDJ!

Andy reeves
Andy reeves
1 day ago
Reply to  SailorBoy

😁

David
David
3 days ago

Fooling time is passed and gone so your the fool for carrying on!!!!!!

George Allison
4 minutes ago
Reply to  David

What are you talking about?

Nick
Nick
2 days ago

What a lot of b. I remember a film made years ago about the prisoner of Zenda in… guess where Yes ruritania. Another April fools joke?