The Royal Navy fleet has been left with only one ship of the line, new figures have revealed.

New figures have shown that HMS Victory is the only commissioned ship of the line in the ENTIRE fleet, the lowest number in centuries.

We spoke to Asda based defence commentator Craig who assured us:

“This is a result of centuries of neglect when it comes to our ship of the line fleet, we couldn’t do Trafalgar again even if we wanted to!”

HMS Victory is a 104-gun first-rate ship of the line of the Royal Navy, ordered in 1758, laid down in 1759 and launched in 1765. She is best known for her role as Lord Nelson’s flagship at the Battle of Trafalgar on 21 October 1805.

If you’re reading this please check the date above a this was an April Fools Day article and as such, is nonsense.



  1. Only one commissioned ship of the line and we still can’t get any planes on it? I bet it leaks too..
    I guess that happens when we build our ships in ROK instead of Scottish yards that were promised them.

    We have failed as a nation.
    Too much?

  2. I would imagine if we did get her seaworthy she’d be an amazing ambassador for the UK and would be widely requested for port visits. She’s no longer a war machine but as a machine she’s beautiful and I bet would get loads of visitors and good will for the UK.

    They could also make it some kind of special assignment for select armed forces personnel as I would think crewing it would be a huge badge of honour.

    • Tragically the cost and logistics behind that would be far too prohibitive in the current economic climate. Plus, can you imagine the headlines if the 253 year old flagship of the Royal Navy went down in a storm or something?

      Modern warships deploying abroad on successful combat ops, showcasing UK technology would be far better ambassadors

  3. Britain use to be a world-leading builder of ships of the line. Questions must be asked. maybe we should buy the “Grand Turk” & “Golden Hinde” replicas. Is the “Dawn Treader” availible?

    Sail power is entirely green. It would be responsible indeed for the RN to return to wind power, so when we sink nuclear powered warships that polute the world for 1,000s of years, we can do so with a lovely feeling of smug self-righteousness. How about pedlo’s?


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