As part of an effort to boost the Scottish economy, the UK Government have announced that a new nuclear missile launch silo will be opened in Cambuslang, Glasgow.
The Tories have described this as a “last ditch effort to save the union”.
MoD Spokesman Lee Iyar said:
“Glasgow was chosen as it’s already used to being near nuclear weapons and any accidents would, to be honest, improve the look of the city.”
This comes after the announcement that the UK is overturning a previous pledge to reduce the size of its nuclear weapons stockpile to 180 warheads by the mid-2020s, lifting the cap instead to as many as 260.
The 100-page Integrated Review document sets out the UK’s national security and foreign policy approach. The following is an excerpt from the document.
“The fundamental purpose of our nuclear weapons is to preserve peace, prevent coercion
and deter aggression. A minimum, credible, independent nuclear deterrent, assigned
to the defence of NATO, remains essential in order to guarantee our security and that
of our Allies. In 2010 the Government stated an intent to reduce our overall nuclear warhead stockpile ceiling from not more than 225 to not more than 180 by the mid-2020s. However, in recognition of the evolving security environment, including the developing range of technological and doctrinal threats, this is no longer possible, and the UK will move to an overall nuclear weapon stockpile of no more than 260 warheads.
To ensure that our deterrent is not vulnerable to pre-emptive action by potential
adversaries, we will maintain our four submarines so that at least one will always be on a
Continuous At Sea Deterrent patrol. Our submarines on patrol are at several days’ notice
to fire and, since 1994, we do not target our missiles at any state. We remain committed
to maintaining the minimum destructive power needed to guarantee that the UK’s nuclear
deterrent remains credible and effective against the full range of state nuclear threats
from any direction.“
Congratulations and thank you for reading the whole article, this is just an April Fools Day joke. The article above is not true and if anyone is sharing this after the 1st of April, please do remind them of that fact. The purpose of this article, aside from our usual April Fools day joke, is to make the point that reading beyond the headline should be the norm every day, not just on the 1st of April.
There’s a large volume of misinformation online, make sure you don’t add to it by sharing articles without reading them. Finally, be careful of the person sharing this article after the 1st of April as they very clearly don’t read what they share.
“Glasgow was chosen as it’s already used to being near nuclear weapons and any accidents would, to be honest, improve the look of the city.”
I can just imagine the SNP quoting that 😂
This is 100% going to appear in some SNP Facebook groups for sure 😂
And about time too, at least glaswegians won’t have too worry about heating bills going through the Roof , or having too eat Reaybrek for a warm glow ,George
😎
I’m glad this is only an April’s Fool joke as that kind of commitment would be very expensive.
A nice green glow will contrast nicely with the blue face paint, me thinks.
You are just adding fuel to the flames with this joke junk – some will believe this stuff AND all the fake news too with or without April fools disclaimers.- this is NOT helping anyone.
Ok,
Who uttered Beetlejuice three times?
Is that you Vladdi: draughty down that Kremlin bunker?
“any accidents would, to be honest, improve the look of the city”
Not pulling any punches there, are you, George? 🙂
I did hear they were going to base some strategic bombers at Birmingham airport and base one of each of the nuclear deterrent boats in Bristol, Liverpool, Ulster and Grimsby just to spread the nuclear love to all the best and nicest bits of the U.K.
Shame it’s a joke. A minimum nuclear deterent is a fools policy in its self. Especially now Russia conventional threat is in tatters. It will increasingly look to nukes for defence and potentially to attack us. The UK will be top of their target list. No doubt. We should either get rid of nukes all together or if we want to stay in the club we need everything from tactical nukes to being able to completely guarantee the destruction of Western Russia. Nothing else I am afraid will deter the hawks in the Kremlin. Our politicians do not get defence nor do they understand Putin and his cohorts. This in its self could lead to the unthinkable.
Nah – CANZUK rules OK.
Hi STC
The U.K. nuclear deterrent is fine as it is, a single boat is able to hold every Russian city of over a million souls at risk, so a single boat response would probably kill around 30 million Russians and end Russia as a meaningful nation.
In all likelihood the U.K. could get a second boat to sea as well.
But that’s not all the U.K. deterrent is actually a geopolitical End of the world trigger. Why is that, well it keeps the USA honest, because if the U.K. launches its strategic deterrent then both Russia and the US are forced to launch all of there deterrents at each other as well. This is because of a number of unknowns and essentially the creation of chaos with complex systems. So:
1) As the U.K. deterrent is sub launched know one will have a clue who launched the attack and Russia will not have the time to figure it out so they will have to assume a Western attack and launch at everyone.
2) Even if Russia knew it was the U.K., they could never assume its not not part of a U.K. US co-ordinated attack and so they would launch at everyone.
3) even if Russia knew it was a U.K. only action, they know they are just about to loss everything that makes them a power, leaving them utterly open to conquest by the US and rest of NATO…so they will launch at everyone anyway (it’s part of the Russian the west is the enemy of the motherland internal dialogue)
4) The US are perfectly aware of points one, two and three and so would assume there would be an immediate response and launch at Russia…. Russia knows this and even if they did not trigger because of points 1,2,3 they will still trigger because they would believe the US would have to trigger……
Nuclear balance is interesting and the U.K. deterrent was always about both keeping everyone honest and creating even more strategic ambiguity as the U.K. and US have different launch criteria, so it played with the USSR senior leaders minds even more.
The final point is all the more modern impact studies of nuclear exchanges. Even a small nuclear exchange of say 50 warheads a side would remove around 10% of the worlds food production for 10 years, so your probably looking at close to a billion dead from starvation, if the U.K. was to throw two boat loads of warheads at Russia. and Russia responded with a couple of hundred warheads you would be looking at the loss of 30% of the human population over a decade of world wide starvation. Black soot from burning cities is catastrophic for The whole of humanity, not the actual blast effect or radiation, which is a more regional issue.
No we’re still waiting for you to see sense and rejoin us. Biden n Trump free zone just saying. 😀
Imagine leaving a country due to Biden and Trump to come to a country led by Cameron or BJ?
Light brigade….. CHARGE!!!
😂😂
Haha-IF we nuked western Russia & even IF there was no retalation, Eastern Europe & probably western Europe & the near east would be irradiated from fall-out for centuries.
An old one but a funny one.
SNP to bring scotrail into public ownership.
another april foolsday perhaps ?
Video has emerged of the first kill of the starstreak missile on a Russian Mi 28 (Havoc) Helicopter, takes the tail right off
40 yrs ago today my god time has slipped through my fingers like Sand and we thought it was an April fools joke
Surely time to start moving missiles to England. I seem to remember Sean Connery talking about Polaris submarine pens in London in James Bond so we can maybe put them there.
If I’m not mistaken, It would seem to be My Understanding, that, Scottish Fire and Rescue services have their most modern Training Facilities in the Cambuslang area of South Lanarkshire Unitary Authority, Scotland
Hopefully Not “on a Shooting at the First Opportunity but, Reviewing Consequences Later for Refinements “of How Many Minutes to Attend Shouts” for Response Times etc.
With due apologies to my many friends, past and present, whom were/are Serving Fire Services Officers and Fire Persons in the service of the former Strathclyde Fire Brigade and, the, Nowadays, Scottish Fire and Rescue Services whom care for the Population of Scotland through Regular Training In Service Procedures, It would seem